I know we haven't been keeping up with the gleecaps lately, and that's because in all honesty you should never miss an episode of Glee, and because of that, we just stopped doing gleecaps for a whole two weeks, just to see how you'd react, but really we just ended up letting you down, and so now you're missing episodes and you can't get caught up, because we're being irresponsible, and really it just ends up being a monumental fail on all parts. So, in case you missed last week's 4x15 "Girls (and Boys) on Film", here's what you have to catch up on with Glee:
The show opens with a black and white dream sequence where Will & Emma are singing You're All The World To Me. It was a cool number, but these dream sequences are hard to keep up with.
Schue wakes up and decides to turn this emotional roller coaster into his inspiration for the Glee Club's weekly lesson: Songs in Film, which... in true Schuester fashion has to be done as a boys vs. girls mash off competition. So. Do with that what you will... (When did Schue come back to be the New Directions coach? I know he came back for the wedding, but did I miss the part where he came back for good? The part where he told Finn to sit down, he's back? This is what I get for not keeping up with the Gleecaps...)
By the way, Artie's doing a micro-budget film (maybe, this is going to lead somewhere else... I see a future storyline unraveling...). The winner of the mash-off gets to star in it...
Finn, consumed with guilt, decides it's in his best interest to track Emma down for Will. He starts with Sue, who is NOT fond of helping this "flop-sweat smelling, fake-teen teaching, army-deserting, high-school-lurking, Sectionals-losing, special-needs-baby hating..." (kid?) so... He asks Artie for help. Who logically suggests starting with her parents... ding! ding! ding! What do we have for him Johnny?! He and Artie (later in the episode) disguise themselves as serious gingers & find out her whereabouts.
In the meantime, in an attempt to make the 500th number all-inclusive and fun, Britt and Blaine catch up with the New Directions and decide they want to kick off movie week with Shout from Animal House. It was a fun scene. And Happy 500th Glee!
Let's not forget to switch to NYC every now and then, because this episode really marked the highlight of Santana's career at New York... which leads me to this: Santana, Kurt (and Adam.. from the Apples), and Rachel are snowed in. So they decide to start a movie marathon, and after a brief confrontation where Rachel asks Santana to leave because she's making her (and Brody) feel uncomfortable in her (and Kurt's) sanctuary... Santana narrows the movie selection down to Knocked Up, Rosemary's Baby, and She's Having a Baby... I sense a theme here... If you missed "I Do", well... Anyways, Rachel doesn't want to watch those, so Moulin Rouge it is!
Let's switch to another dream sequence scene... Blaine and Kurt singing Come What May on top of their roof in Bushwick. Then it comes back to reality, where is snuggled with Adam and Rachel, crying at his imaginary dream. When prompted, he said he was having contact issues. Santana in true-Lopez fashion responds with "Really? I thought you were crying because you always said that you and Blaine would sing that to each other at your wedding."
Then... in even more phenomenal Lopez-Fashion, Santana starts rattling on about Brody, noting to the others that "That Brody character is a freakin' psycho.... When I first met him, totally thought he was weird. He smelt all talcumy, like a Cabbage Patch Doll. And then he said I wasn't a real New Yorker until I had my first makeover, and I was like 'what does that even mean?! Like who are you?!" and this continued for an entertaining five minutes or so. What we learn... Santana thinks Brody is a drug dealer because she found $1200 cash and a pager in his pockets as she rattled through all of their pockets and drawers in the house.
Side note: this is one of my favorite Santana lines of all time, and let's be real... this episode was packed FULL of them: "Okay, I like how you guys pretend to be all accepting about everything, but when your friend suddenly shows up in your home, moves in, and goes through all your stuff, you're offended?! [MVP award, for sure].
And as if these last two NYC points weren't good enough, Santana continues to question Brody's whereabouts, so Rachel calls him. All the while Rachel's on the phone, Santana's pretending to grind up some coke with a credit card, snort it up, and act all crazy. I gotsta admit, Santana has found her calling: antagonize Rachel Berry in her home. It makes for great fun! Anyways, Brody is abrupt and Kurt agrees with Santana.... Drug dealer.
Back in Ohio, the boys perform their mashup of Tom Cruise movies: Danger Zone/Old Time Rock 'n Roll. It was good. Though it didn't serve much of a purpose.
In between the boys mashup and the girls mashup, Kitty and Marley have a little exchange where Kitty admits to being mean behind Marley's back and in front of her face, but since they both like hanging out with Jews together, they should be friends. So Marley decides it's a good idea to tell Kitty that Ryder kissed her even though she's dating little Puck. Uh oh.
Cut to the girls mashup of Diamonds are a Girl's Best Friend/Material Girl, which was a little awkward and weird, and happened to be the same exact mashup from Moulin Rouge. Original? No. But that's alright I guess.
Back at NYADA, Kurt and Adam have a heart to heart in which Adam basically asks Kurt if he's over Blaine... to which Kurt replies that he desperately wants to be... Adam was pleased, but it didn't sound like a "yes" to me...
Finn tells Will where Emma is. So the New Directions and Will decide to go to Emma's sister's house where she's staying to recreate the scene from Say Anything, performing In Your Eyes with a boom box over his head. In my opinion this was okay, but the Will and Emma exchange was uncomfortable. Ultimately Emma says she ran because she didn't know Will anymore, and they decide to start from scratch and go see a movie next week. Ughhh. It's like the relationship that will never progress... Ever.
Back in New York, Santana waltzes back into the apartment claiming she's found her people... to which I agree 100%... but Rachel doesn't seem enthused. Santana questions her about "the stick" (again... just go catch up on these episodes will ya? We're talking about a pregnancy test that Santana found while rooting through the bathroom trash can), and Rachel just responds by crying. Santana holds her, like the true friend she is... and says "It's okay. You're going to be okay. It's going to be okay." Basically it just melts your little heart and makes you instantly forgive Santana for all the Berry-Brody-Bashing she's been doing.
Jake owns up to his lack of Valentine's Day ideas. So he takes her into the pottery room at McKinley, and he sings Unchained Melody to her, while they pot... together. Although Marley starts dreaming up Ryder (seriously, what is it with these imagination scenes here? I feel like I should be on coke... or pot... [lulz, puns] to figure it out!)
When the song concludes, Marley admits to knowing it was Ryder. She also admits to Ryder kissing her... and her letting Ryder kiss her... Jake leaves... Quietly.
Then back in the choir room, Will announces
The New Directions is unamused... because really, why bother having competitions when they all win, or according to Sugar, lose, anyways? Whatever.
Meanwhile, Finn calls Will into the hall to tell him that he kissed Emma... (to which you reply 'WHAT?!?!' Because we missed episode 4x14's Gleecap. Seriously, would you just watch the damn show?!) And then Will leaves.... Quietly. Jeez people. Say something, would ya?
And... because it's relevant and all of our questions were answered [lulz, sarcasm], we jump right into Footloose... which, is fun anyways...
...And that's what you missed on Glee!
Peace.Love.Glee
-Bonnie and Whitney
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