Monday, April 23, 2012

Gleecap: Glee 3x16 - 'Saturday Night Glee-ver' Recap

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You missed the episode dedicated to disco? I'm lactating with rage. Nevertheless, here's the scoop on the white (non-zoot) suits, shiny dance floor, "What do I do with my future?" moments, and that's right... Brittana. Sit back and enjoy this delicious serving of piping hot disco fever magic.

The episode opens up with You Should Be Dancing featuring Blaine Warbler, Mike, and beloved Brittany (who should always be dancing). The trio wants disco for nationals as the theme this year is vintage. Schue likes it, but there's just one problem: "disco sucks," according... well everybody else.

Schue is concerned for Finn, Mercedes, and Santana as graduation is quickly approaching and all three seem a little lost. The more pressing concern is why Schue has dolls representing students. Pedo-tastic.

Santana just wants to be famous, no matter what it takes.

Schue has been out of ideas since Madonna week. Sue suggests a lesson dedicated to the album "Saturday Night Fever." The kids hate disco, but they love swag.

Enter Mercedes and Kurt's love child, Wade Adams, from Vocal Adrenaline. Mr. Swag himself, Jesse St. James, is his coach but Chunks McGriddle wants to do drag in the upcoming performance. Enter: Unique, his female alter-ego.

Sue lends the Glee club her disco dance floor. Rachel doesn’t support disco, but a couple Glee clubbers do so cue Night Fever, it's time for the dance off! Winner gets a white Travolta suit. Kurt needs that suit. They're all officially amazing, but the 3 finalists are Santana, Mercedes, and Finn (obviously rigged). Schue assigns the trio to pick a disco song to perform and then share their dreams for the future.

Mercedes has a dream, she just doesn't know how to get there. Singing Disco Inferno is a step in the right direction. Brittana back-up dancing? Burn, baby, burn. Sam records the performance. Mercedes’ dream is to be like Mariah, Whitney (RIP), and Aretha. Once again Schue is uninspiring.

Puck doesn't want to go to LA without Finn, but Finn doesn't know what he wants to do. Looks like Puck is going solo.
Sue tells Porcelain and Weezy to have Wade perform as Unique, complete with a pair of 13-wide heels from Janet Reno, ensuring a New Directions win at regionals as a drag performance is sure to fail.

Santana sings If I Can't Have You. She's amazing, as per usual. Schue interprets the performance as a stand for marriage equality and says she's off to law school to make it happen (fic feelings anyone?). Of course she wants marriage equality and Brittany will always be her girlfriend (SCORE), but her mistress... is fame. "I can’t live, withouts mah fame." She won’t be like the theater nerds that will starve in New York, no offense Gay Berry.

Anyone who is engaged to Rachel should come to the auditorium. Finchel make up for the umpteenth time and decide to explore Finn's dreams while Rachel serenades her man with How Deep is Your Love.

Santana is getting stared at like she’s Finn and she just won butter eating competition. She's famous... thanks to Brittany's release of their sex tape: "Two Girls, One Cat."

Finn doesn’t know what he wants. He just wants time to stop. Schue tells him he can do anything and makes him watch "Saturday Night Fever".

Santana wants Britt to take the video down, but she can't now, she just got her boob in the door and they can't rest. Eat that bull testicle and prep for Fear Factor!

The laziest person alive and the pasty-face ghost boy visit Wade backstage and tell him not to dress up as a woman, but his mind is made up. Unique owns the stage during Boogie Shoes.

Finn sings his assignment song for the week: More Than A Woman. Kurt has season one hair and Tike is precious as ever. It’s a couples dance party, Brittana included (*ovaries explosion*). Finn finally knows what he wants to do: he wants to move in NYC with Rachel and attend Inside The Actor's Studio. He wants to be an actor and he's unafraid of dreaming big, thanks to Rachel. And in a surprising turn of events, I found this Finchel scene mildly cute. Huh.

Samcedes scene. Sam uploaded Mercedes' performance and it's going viral. He believes in her and now complete strangers do too. He urges her on and a Samcedes kiss ensues.

Sue is disappointed in Boobs McGoo, but not just for the sex tape, as she released her own with Oliver North on Beta Max, and Cheney still has a copy. Santana is embarrassed for not caring how she got her fame and wants to go to college. Thankfully for Lady Ta-ta, she's already been accepted to college with a (magic?) full scholarship. Perhaps she can get a business degree and open up a taco truck (Sue is still confused as to her ethnicity). The application was Brittany's idea. PRAISE. They're in love and hug it out (that’s all we get? C'mon RIB).

And the winner of this week's disco assignment is... all three of them. It's time to strut the halls in their white leisure suits to the delicious sounds of Staying Alive. Even Sue and Schue get in on the suit dance party and everyone is looking fresh, especially Tina. Just sayin'.

And that’s what you missed... on Glee!

*As always... thanks to Ashley for writin' up this bad boy! Go follow her on twitter now! @ashhens.*

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